Forever Present
I have been through many things in my short life but there is one discovery I have found to be helpful- be forever present. As a single father of three amazing children, I have realized that I can consider tomorrow while refraining from worry. There is nothing wrong with pondering variables that concern me but I am not worrisome and I am not anxious. I have learned self discipline and to keep order. My ability to focus and to be forever present has given my children an atmosphere to explore life without fear and uncertainty. They know that we are traveling through life together based on my interaction with them and my confidence in who I am as a person and then a father. I am my own person first but as a father, I am quickly able to calculate their needs and edify them based on their understanding during evolving circumstances such as family dynamics because my mind is right there with them. Forever present and participating in family living. The tricky part is enjoying each season of life and paying attention to the appropriate details. Why worry about tomorrow when there is enough trouble in the present day? We must remember, the rat race becomes mesmerizing when not living a present life and can lead a parent to desire things for their children that children never wanted in the first place or may not be useful in the current season of life.
Imagine being at the beach on a nice summer day but your mind is constantly thinking about winter. Moreover, your mind is so fixated on winter that you end up wearing a winter coat to the beach and complain about the heat. This might sound like a crazy example but how many times do people bring things into their life too soon or desire things that are not appropriate for their current season of life. Telltale phrases like, “Ugh, I can't wait until my kids grow up,” this implies the desire to pass over the younger years of parenting, “We are practically married, if you loved me, you would have sex with me,” the desire to participate in an action that belongs to a spouse without the responsibility of marriage, “You need to be a man and take care of me and pay my bills,” desiring the assurance of protection without being willing to be in the role of being a protectee or subject to the protector, or “I want my kids to have everything I never had,” filling their life with things and robbing them of a personal relationship with their parent.
This frame of mind is quickly developed by intently watching the lives of others and coveting the noun they have without understanding key differences. Also, the runners in the rat race constantly worry about measuring up and act as if they are living in scarcity. The sobering fact is this, time is scarce and we do not know how much of it we truly have but people still refuse to prioritize accordingly.
Please note, there is nothing wrong with planning for the next season but it is important to remember that things are designed for particular seasons and become inappropriate when utilized at the wrong time. Yet, society marches onward to prove they are their own masters by defiantly donning the wrong attire and acquiring titles that belong to another. They complain of starvation but refuse to plant or gather, they spend what they don’t have, they want benefits without responsibility, and they desire what belongs to another.
I believe it all boils down to what a person believes about themself and where they find their identity. A person who believes they are unlovable, undeserving, or has no value versus an individual who believes they are loved, worthy, or desirable would clearly be revealed in their behavior and life choices. A person’s belief in who they are will determine their actions and shape the environment around them.
As a child, the one thing that caused frustration or anxiety was not knowing what I was supposed or allowed to do in a given situation. Once I knew the rules of engagement, I confidently acted and made meaningful choices. The most important thing was to know who I am and I discovered that my identity was in Christ, imago Dei, made in the image of God. I only had to make one choice and to be forever present. Only then did everything else fall into its proper place. That is why Matthew 6:33 is so profound, “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” But how can you do this if your mind is heavily divided and captivated by fleeting things from off seasons?
